There’s no good way to work “I have multiple sclerosis” into a conversation. In the beginning, right after the diagnosis, sure. Plenty of opportunities at that point because it’s nearly impossible to hide that you are GOING THROUGH SOME HEAVY SHIT. Well. That was my experience, anyway.
Those first couple weeks, I told most of my close friends, my parents (and then, 10 minutes later, my mom had told our whole extended family–not awesome), sister, boss, immediate co-workers, some dude…. And then, I began to slow my rate of disclosure. Why? Because springing that news on people who care about you isn’t fun. They tend to get upset. I got tired of riding the “I’m okay, you’re okay, no really it’s okay”/”This sucks, my life is over” roller coaster.
So now I try to keep it to myself and only disclose on a need-to-know basis. For instance, I told my dentist last week. Seemed appropriate, since they’ve made my face go numb a lot. But I didn’t tell my gynocologist. Didn’t come up, didn’t feel like bringing it up. Insurance company? They won’t pay for my drugs, so why tell them?
And then there are the many, many times when I have a “huh. that’s new.” moment and want to tell the person sitting closest to me (awkward). But it’s hard to keep all this to myself. It’s new. Vexing. Utterly frightening.
So here I am, with my very own, shiny-new blog. And a Twitter (follow me!) for those aforementioned ah-ha/huh moments. But really, TinglyFeeling is about being about to speak freely about MS without fear of making people uncomfortable.
If you’re reading this, it’s because you’re interested in learning about multiple sclerosis (I hope), you have it yourself (condolences), or you know someone who does (best wishes all around). Whoever you are, I hope you’ll share your experiences with myself and other readers, ask questions, whathaveyou. And I’ll do my best to be honest, even when it seems like too much information.
Welcome to TinglyFeeling.
