I’m still obsessed with the weather. The heat makes me weak, the cold makes me hurt (and fatigued and depressed). So this transitional, late-August Seattle weather has been kind of brutal. (And I don’t mean “brutal” in a bad-ass, black-metal sort of way [sorry--I've been watching a lot of "Metalocalypse" lately].) Ech. Hot-cold-hot-cold-hot-cold. Pick one, already.
So, I’m dreading fall. It means that the outdoor funtimes I’ve enjoyed during this SUPER AWESOME summer have to come to an end (I’m a fair-weather fun-haver). And, the yo-yo-ing temperatures mean that I’m probably going to be in pain a lot more often. It’s totally depressing. Like, for reals. Which is kind of a new wrinkle in this whole MS adventure. I don’t usually get and then stay depressed, but this glum feeling has been sticking with me longer than usual–and it’s not the right time of month for that.
I can’t blame it entirely on the weather, though, as work has been very stressful for the last couple months. My job, as a concept, is awesome. I get paid to write/concept/create/collaborate all day. However, the execution portion of my projects has been a total clusterfuck. I can’t get ahead or even catch up because I’m spending most of my time fixing and revising and rethinking work I’ve already done. Not because I did it poorly, but because plans/minds/players/budgets changed. And also because of a typhoon in Thailand. Seriously.
The loss of control at work certainly isn’t helping me feel more grounded in the rest of my life. I need some degree of stability so I can handle the day-to-day physical changes that Multiple Sclerosis brings. I haaaate things being out of my control because it means I can’t plan ahead. Plus, it’s exhausting. Actually, today, it even made me want to cry a little.
So, tonight, I decided that I’m going to take care of some things that I’ve been slacking on and see if that will make me feel better. First, this (hello!) blog update. Then, I’m gonna put my scanner to work on some photos I took with my Holga camera. I’ve been putting that off for a long time. Scanning is teee-dious.
Oh–and I also need to put some of the Kentucky Mint growing on my deck to work in a Mint Julep. That probably won’t happen tonight, but it’s a shame that my mint has yet to see the inside of a Julep this summer–which might not seeem like a very important thing to have on a to-do list, but seeing how big my mint plant has gotten is sort of stressing me out. All that leafy summer goodness, going to waste.
